Three Interesting Conversations and what became of them

Well I have about twenty minutes here before supper so hopefully I will be able to get all my thoughts down at once, otherwise there will be a part two again. This is a carry on of a previous post about interesting conversations. Also so sorry again for my kindle typing, I know its hard to read. Will fix it the next time I have access to an actual computer. So saturday night  an interesting chat with a lady from what is termed "Special Areas" and for safety I wont say her name or where she is serving.  There were two basic points she made that really made me stop and think. It came up in conversation where I was in my planning to go overseas for missions and she very bluntly asked me ''so whats holding you back?' This was something that made me pause and think, if my elders have agreed to commend me and the missionaries in the area are open to me coming, then why am I still hanging back? Also we discussed about leaving family behind and about supporting them a what if they get sick? And again she pointed out 'but they arent sick now' again I had to pause and think: its true tehey aren't sick now and right now there are many sick and desperate ppl in the world that could use my skills and that desperately need the gospel. so that was a good conversation, a highlight to the week!

The next conversation was a little unsettling. One of the facilitators of the program came to me to ask how I was enjoying 'hanging out with us chapel folk' and to ask what my elders thought of my coming down to MOP and spending time here with ppl they wouldn't normally fellowship with. And to be honest that really hurt. I know he is a very sweet man, but it doesn't remove the fact that this judgement of who I am and what I believe still hurts. I guess its just a reminder to me to be careful of what I say and to avoid saying things that may be remotely hurtful or judgemental- thankfully I have a very good friend that is super conscious of these things and I know she will keep me in line. Am debating at this time if I should go back to this gentleman to clarify what he ment and if the other facilitators also would hold the same view or if they care.... comments? He did however have some interesting insights having been raised on a mission station but in Angola. He thinks that while mission stations definitely need to be revamped and have the idea reconsidered and modified for the culture, the age, and to stay in line with Biblical principals their role is not completely obsolete. I asked him what he meant by that but he said later in the week these questions may be answered so I guess I will have to wait and See and mabe ask him again at the end or via email At home.

And for the third conversation and I only have five minutes. I wasn't really part of this one but was at the table where it was being discussed. One missionary from South Africa was adamantly opposed to mission stations saying they created institutions that cost more and more money to support. And that missionaries shouldnt be sent to Zambia anymore because there are already over 1000 assemblies there and the locals should be able to do the work now. I see his point I have struggled with that myself. It was hard to hear as I had just been speaking to some of the girls at the tableabout medical missions in Zambia and then his rather negative comments about mission stations. My goal isn't to stay on the station either, I guess it was just more his view on missionaries being sent to Zambia. What to do with this one tho? Of course when asked about single women feeling the Lords leading there he said yes that is a safe place for a single woman to go and no he wouldnt discourage it. And you can be sure, those of you who know me, the feminist in me did protest!

But what to do about these three conversations? And what is the Lord trying to tell me? Well I'm not sure just yet. But I do wish I had my roomies here! I'm sure they'd have lots to say not just about these convos but also about the sessions which  i will have to try to fill in soon!

An Interesting Conversation

Well its been an interesting two days so far and today isn't over yet! The theme so far has been about the biblical reason for missions and about presenting a clear gospel. The irreducible minimums of the Gospel, the very basic points that people have to understand, are about who God is, who man is, what sin is, and how salvation from sin occurs. Today we had the opportunity to hear about how God has been leading each of us into missions; and three themes have emerged from that and its cool because these are three themes that have emerged in my life. The first is God taking on done a path one never thought to go down. Lots of ppl said they never intended to teach and yet here they are teaching. For me, I never thought I'd go to Zambia. In fact I never wanted to go to Africa in the first place. But God... The second was just stepping back and letting God lead. Which is also something that particularly in the last few months has been impressed upon me. Just stepping  back and following whereever God leads. The third was about serving wherever God calls one to go, including at home. And this is something that I have prayed about so much. There is so much work to be done here and so much opportunity. I just want to make sure that I am open to wherever the Lord leads into whatever country He leads me to, even if it is to stay here and working here for Him. Last night I had an interesting conversation that has sort of solidifies things for me. but I've run out of time so there will be a part two to this blog.

Missionary Friends and MOP

well a quick update and excuse the lack of punctuation i'm typing this on my kindle. The meeting with Shawn n Rhonda on monday went very well and many things came out of that. On my mind right now is leaving family and how can I as the eldest daughter leave my responsibilities for another. I wish there was an answer. The closest I got was you have to decide if God calls you then you have to be aware and willing to make that decision. But thats still so hard to let go of... But some of the other things we discussd were things I sorta already had a conviction about or at least had thots about. Learning the language. Living on a mission station where the missionaries speak english and the locals are trying to learn english, its easy to just skimp and avoid language studies. But well, I want them to know that I care about them and what a better way to show it then like a baby letting myself be teased and showing they and their culture are importat to me. Then too we discussed not letting my happiness depend on the opinions of those around me. This one may be more difficult. I am a people pleaser. I want ppl to be happy with me. but I  have learned from experience it doesn't always happen that way. I guess this is something that I will be working on for a little while. But I am not there to please the missionaries. I am there to please the One who sent me. So I'll go with an idea of what it is I am supposed to do and try not to rock the boat and just seek to please God who sent me and not get upset when I feel like I have failed someone. It was a great visit tho and I'm so glad I had the opportunity to chat about serious and practical things with them. 
And now I'm here at MOP the Missionary Orientation Program and it promises to be an intensive and hopefully profitable week. I am most hopeful to learn about interpersonal relationships with other missionaries and also about cross cultural communication. I am by nature rather businesslike. I get things done. The Lunda tribe I am going to are relational. They will talk anout everything before they even begin to discuss an issue and then they don't even really discuss it. They are all non confrontational, which works for me because I hate conflict ;) . But I know my mannerisms can sometimes seem like I'm upset. So this will be definitely something I need to watch for in my self and learn to avoid... i arrived here late last night after almost a whole day of driving. Its a beautiful campground, I cant wait to hike thru it and explore, but now its just about time for the day to begin. Lets see how this adventure goes!